Traditionally, South Africa is known as a place where relationships are paramount, and even if you only visit the country briefly, you’ll likely encounter this attitude firsthand. According to a study by Remitly, which looked at personality traits in different nations, the people of South Africa are considered to be the friendliest in the world. While there might be several explanations for this finding, the concept of ubuntu is arguably one of the most important.
Fast facts
- What is ubuntu? Ubuntu is a philosophy and term that represents collectivism and interdependence between people.
- Where does it originate? Ubuntu is said to have originated in the indigenous communities of South Africa, though versions of the concept are found across the African continent.
- Related concepts: whakawhanaungatanga in Māori culture, ren in Confucianism
A quick disclaimer on ubuntu in modern-day South Africa
A friendly, cooperative society is just what we could all use these days. Around the world, a “loneliness epidemic” has been taking shape, a trend that was only exacerbated by the COVID-19 pandemic. It seems no country is immune, and — quick disclaimer — that includes South Africa too1.
Without diving too deep into South Africa’s history (though we suggest you research further after you’re done reading here), there isn’t one cohesive South African culture. As a result, not everyone in the country practices ubuntu, and even those who agree with it might not always abide by its philosophy.
Still, ask many South Africans (and others across Africa) about ubuntu and they’ll likely say that it’s had a great influence on their life and personal choices. And with that in mind, the concept is still worth learning if you’re feeling down and disconnected, no matter what part of the globe you’re from or what culture you belong to.
Defining ubuntu
It’s hard to talk about ubuntu without mentioning the Zulu phrase “Umuntu ngumuntu ngabantu,” which translates in English to “a person is a person through persons.” Put another way, our connection to others is what makes us human — a central tenet of the ubuntu way of life. When we work together and support each other, we gain a sense of self. Essentially, it’s the antithesis of the Western value of individualism, where people are encouraged to pursue selfish happiness and claim resources for themselves. This attitude, when taken too far, can contribute to feelings of loneliness and isolation.
Leaders have relied on the ubuntu concept to inspire the people of South Africa when the country was greatly divided. Nelson Mandela often spoke of the philosophy and, in one interview, gave his definition of the term: “A traveler through a country would stop at a village and he didn’t have to ask for food or for water. Once he stops, the people give him food, entertain him. That is one aspect of ubuntu, but it will have various aspects.” He went on to explain that ubuntu doesn’t prohibit people from enriching themselves; it encourages them to enrich themselves to support and help others around them.
Archbishop Desmond Tutu also defined ubuntu in his book “No Future Without Forgiveness,” writing, “A person with Ubuntu is open and available to others, affirming of others, does not feel threatened that others are able and good, for he or she has a proper self-assurance that comes from knowing that he or she belongs in a greater whole and is diminished when others are humiliated or diminished, when others are tortured or oppressed.”
How ubuntu can transform your social life
Ubuntu might sound like a nice way to inspire a country in books or speeches, but don’t overlook its impact on a practical, personal level. In an era when it’s all too easy to hide behind a screen or ghost acquaintances to avoid confrontation, ubuntu encourages vulnerability. It serves as a reminder that you have to make yourself open and available to others to forge connections. Of course, not everyone will respond to your openness the way you might hope, but some will. Pay attention to those who mirror your ubuntu mindset and are ready to connect — not the ones who aren’t.
If you’re feeling alone or isolated, there’s also something comforting about ubuntu and its principle that people are people through other people. During those times when you feel small and insignificant in the world, you can remember that your actions really do make an impact on others, for better or for worse. On a bad day, you can take your frustration out on others by aggressively honking at drivers or being short with a service worker. These choices can have a ripple effect, where your bad day becomes another person’s bad day and so on. Alternatively, you can approach each interaction as an opportunity to spread positivity, such as by complimenting a stranger’s outfit or being patient with the barista who messed up your coffee order. These little moments act as a quick antidote to loneliness and an indication that you’re not as alone as you might think. And who knows: Your kindness could even lead to a meaningful friendship.
How to practice ubuntu in daily life
Adopting a collectivist approach isn’t always easy if you live in an individualistic society. With that said, there are simple ways to bring the ubuntu spirit to your everyday life. Here are a few ideas to try:
- Take off your headphones during your neighborhood walks and smile at or greet the people you pass.
- Put yourself out there and message a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while.
- Be the first to apologize — and forgive — after a conflict.
- Be generous by leaving tips at your favorite coffee shop, donating food, or dropping a surprise gift at your neighbor’s door.
- Celebrate your loved ones’ successes, whether big or small. Organize a dinner for a friend who finished a difficult work project or plan a get-together for a family member who overcame an illness, for instance.
- Vow to not leave any negative or destructive comments on social media.
- Put yourself in someone else’s shoes before judging their behavior.